Shaking up the universe, shaking off the ghosts

I had a day recently that made me wonder about the power of the universe. It could be a little ‘woo woo’ to say this, but have you ever felt like the second you move forward, your past comes in to pull you back? It’s like the ghosts of our lives can feel us silently pull away and somehow they know to reach out.

This past Sunday, I heard from every man I’ve talked to in the last six months, unprovoked. One is a long distance text pal that will never be more; another a man I met on vacation. There was a text from a man I’m still trying to get over. And finally, the ex.

I’m not kidding when I say this all came within an hour of deciding I was going to take the leap and go on a date with a new guy I just met online, who we’ll call Whiskey  J. Also noteworthy is that all but one man sent messages out of character from their usual bland salutations. They were forward, sweet and there were two direct invitations. Few words were minced, or even salted for that matter. And I didn’t text them back.

Ok, I did eventually, but not that day. I can’t lie to you ladies. As soon as I did, they all fell back into old patterns and I knew I shouldn’t have responded. I’d given the universe exactly what it wanted by falling back into place myself.

The good news is Whiskey J and I had a great date. We were out for seven hours hitting it off after showing up in pretty much the same color scheme and ordering the same dish. The night ended with future plans and a shared kiss (or two.)

My goal this year is to move forward and 2018 is halfway gone. I just had a birthday and feel like I need to reevaluate if my actions are following the goals I’ve set. What I don’t want is to be texting with men who don’t engage beyond flirty digital exchanges every now and then. I want a challenge. I want passion. I want love.

I think being honest about where you are emotionally and checking in on which direction you’re steering the boat is necessary to moving forward in an intentional way. Giving the universe a good tug this month is going to be my way of recharting my course.

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